The Dance of Intimacy

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Intimacy in a relationship is the ability to strip off your masks so someone can see who you truly are. Often people think that taking a pill will help them with the intimacy in their relationship. Unfortunately physically altering your brain chemistry doesn’t solve the communication problems that exist.

We use flirting to determine who is a good candidate to be our partner in life. It’s often like a radio station broadcasting on a frequency. Each has their own flirting behavior and they use it to find someone that can easily pick up on their style. After marriage your flirting turns into a secret love language that only you and your partner can understand.

When someone is trying to reconnect with their partner they have to re-learn to speak to each other in their set flirting language. They have to discuss where the communicative problems lie. Asking questions, such as “what do you like”, ”what do you dislike”, ” what’s effective and what’s ineffective” are great for starting the dialog.

Things that interfere in a relationship are often chosen, such as children. If you decide to have 3 or 4 children you accept that those children are going to demand time and attention. It’s important to take care of your chosen responsibilities while still taking care of yourself and your intimate relationship with your partner. Flirting is important to let each other know that you’re there and that connections can be made innocently but meaningfully.

With bioidentical hormones chemically fixing ones sexual desire, a couple needs to still work together, ideally through therapy, in order to fix their flirtative communication.

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